Anxietea
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The English love a cuppa.
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Yet it is a common misconception that Yorkshire Tea is the most frequently consumed.
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Statistics show that is one in four Brits start the day with a big old gulp of Anxietea.
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We don’t like to milk it.
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Prefer to wince and swallow it straight.
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Society tells us “Strong people drink strong tea.”
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If reality leaves a nasty taste in your mouth, throw some sweetener in. Sugar coat your truth.
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Karen in the office kitchen asks “How are you?”
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You absently reply “I’m fine babe”.
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Fake smile and talk about the weather while your Anxietea comes to the boil.
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God forbid we would actually discuss how we really feel! How terribly un-British that would be.
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Instead, it is common culture to contain all your fears in a tea bag and dunk them into the pit of your stomach.
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Let worst case scenarios silently percolate in your mind.
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Good old Kaz can see the worry pouring across your face, but rest assured she won’t probe you any further.
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Your colleagues are fluent in Niceteas, but don’t want to sip on your Anxietea for fear it might burn their tongue.
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When you feel like this please cup your mug in your hands and take comfort in the heat.
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Close your eyes and breathe until you reach room temperature.
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Please don’t let Anxietea brew in your body.
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We are a nation of tea lovers, you just need to learn the best people to sit down and share your pot of Anxietea with.
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With any luck they will bring chocolate hobnobs...
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Word by Rebecca Archer. Follow her on IG @wandering_in_heels
